reality.

Minho's pose is a perfect reflection of what I am feeling. Sigh, the story goes. I sent out like over 10 copies of my resumes to various firms and agencies yesterday. The last time I tried that after the Os, none of them got back to me. But this time, it was different, this morning i received 2 calls from 2 different agencies. As I had agreed on the interview for the first one, I couldn't work for the second company cause their work starts today.

Okay, so I was scheduled an interview. I read the email the agent sent me and roughly glimpsed through the long list of jobscope. You can't imagine how excited i was. I mean, it's the first time in my life going for a work interview, and you know, it's like WOW, you're going out there already.

But I guess I just wasn't ready for reality. When I reached the office, I had to fill in the form and wait for the manager who was late. And guess what, when she walked in, I forgot that I should be standing up. When I remembered, it was just late by a second. Next, she started asking me if I know what job I was applying for. I stoned for a sec, I mean when i applied, I just saw that it was admin, sounded fun, and so yea, try my luck. When the agent sent me the mail, I only BROWSED through the jobscope. So I answered her with whatever I could recall. Ah, not so bad. Next. Do you know what our company is about? Boy, I heard thunder and saw lightning. Of all the things I did, I forgot to read up about the company! Man, so the manager had to blabber about the company. And I felt so bad about myself, i mean my resume/ application is a reflection of my years of education, and I think I just portrayed a bad image or RV and NJ. Imagine being so done for at a MNC. Yes, you saw it correctly, it's an MNC! *faints* It wasn't like a tom dick or harry company that I messed up! My first job interview, WOW.

The harsh reality of the outside world. I think I'm too nursed. Maybe this job was just not meant for me, however good the pay may be. But whatever it is, I think today, I just got K.O. Really, I've never felt worse. So in reality, Steph is not that confident all the time. The front on stage, when debating, its all acting. Why can't I do better at the interview? Like be more prepared? Then even if I fail, I won't feel as lousy as I feel now. I'm sorry to the agent, sorry to all my teachers. aish.

Elison.