drowning.

所谓人望高处看，可是如果高处太摇不可及，那该如何？

It's like I am thrown overboard in the storm and left to survive in the ocean. Every single time I feel like I finally struggled through to stay afloat, another tsunami hits, and the impact pushes me back, deep into the ocean. It seems that I might just drown, I might just die this time. I am gasping for oxygen.

I remembered when i was 15, i made that prayer to God. A foolish, childish prayer. Little did i expect, when i was 20, I would make that same prayer again.

Stephie.

the still of the night

I guess it's always the nights that make people emotional, set them thinking about anything and everything. I'm human, so i think too.

Sometimes i wonder if everything is worth it. Giving up all those things, losing those friends just so to lead this life that I am living right now. There are times when i wonder am i really happy and is there anybody close to my heart. Sometimes the answers get diluted. Then it's time to rededicate back.

Elison.

sleep sleep sleep.

Wow, I haven't blogged for a month! I've been really tired lately, coming home late and leaving home early isn't the best thing for my body. I'm not exactly looking forward to recess week either, cause there's tons of work left to be done then. Sigh, this semester is really draining for me. 1 project per module is disgusting. Urgh, I can't wait to leave for Korea.

I'm still aching all over. Going to bed soon after I'm done preparing for my interview tomorrow morning. P&G is just an amazing organisation. YAWN. Goodnight world. See you soon.

Love,

stephie.

family.

It's you guys who keep me alive. Thanks for making me who I am today. My family.

Elison.

heartbroken.

Maybe I should give it all up.

Elison.

오랫만 이에요..

Whoa, it's been almost a month since I got this updated! I was kinda caught up with the examinations and so I didn't have time to sit down and blog.

Now that exams are over, I get busier as Christmas is approaching. This year's Christmas is going to be greater than ever. I know it. Hahah, things to be done just have no end to it. ><

Thankfully the holidays are here! Haha, I remember being uber excited for school to start, and now, I can't wait for holidays to come. tsk. There are so many things I want to do this holiday, like bringing my babies out to take photos, watch my korean dramas, study hard for korean and of course hang out with people that I've been missing on!

As 2009 comes to an end, I can't help but do some reflections. This year has been a year full of up and downs. Many things have happened - graduating from NJ, first-time working, getting A level results, going to university, first-time filming for movie, forging new friendships while others terminated.

I realised the reality of the world, reality of society? People are fake. Indeed, you guys are pretty different from us.

And you, I feel so sorry for you. For love for a woman, you sacrifice what God has in store for you. I feel so sorry for you and your sheep. I'm not over-reacting. What is the point of gaining what you want, and losing your own soul? There are consequences that you chose to overlooked, because to you, feelings and love, are more important.

But 2009, God has been a faithful God. While there were people who were very important to me in my life who left me, God has given me new found friendships and strengthened old ones. No one is better to me than God.

Day one of fasting! :D

Okie, gonna rest a while. Have to go for rehearsals later. (:

Elison.

just felt like so.

I just felt in the mood to write.

Sometimes I guess I really hate facebook. I hate the fact that some people have evolved to be just lifeless profile pages. I can only see them off my computer. That's all.

Goodbye-장근석

어떡하죠 바라만 보네요
짧은 인사조차 건낼수가 없네요
시리도록 차가운 내 손 잡아주지만
이제는 그만 보내야하죠

어떡하죠 멀어져 가네요
가슴 가득 눈물만 차오네요
애써 감춰봐도 멈출수가 없어요
끝내 잡지 못한 이 맘을 어떡하나요

사랑했던 그 기억을 놓지 말아요
다시 웃게 해줄 다른 사람 만나도
아픈 이별까지도 그대라 다행이죠
슬픈 눈물 모아서 안녕

아무것도 해준게 없네요
못나게도 상처만 남겼네요
변해간 맘조차 감싸 안아준사람
이제 보내야할 그대를 어떡하나요
사랑했던 그 기억은 놓지 말아요
다시 웃게 해줄 다른 사람 만나도
아픈 이별까지도 그대라 다행이죠
숨이 멎을 만큼 아파와 눈물 흘러도
행복했던 그기억은 놓지 말아요
다시 웃게 해줄 다른 사람 만나도
아픈 이별까지 그대라 다행이죠
닿지 못한 내사랑 이젠 보내야 하죠

오직나를 웃게 할 사람 그대 뿐인걸
사랑이 깊어져 마음이 아파와도
행복했던 그 기억은 놓지 말아요

다시 웃게 해줄 다른 사람 만나도
아픈 이별까지 그대라 다행이죠
슬픈 눈물 모아서 내가 할 수 있는 일
안녕.

What should I do? All I can do is gaze at you
I can't even extend you a short greeting
My achingly cold hand, don't hold it
Now I have to let you go

What should I do? You grow further away
My chest fills with tears
Even though I try hard to hide it, I can't stop
What should I do with this love I can't end

Please don't forget that we loved each other
Even if you meet someone else who makes you laugh
The farewell is painful, but I'm glad that it was you that I loved
Gathering my sorrowful tears, goodbye

I've done nothing for you
Pitifully I've only left you with scars

You who embraced even my changed feelings
Now I have to let you go. What should I do?
Please don't forget that we loved each other
Even if you meet someone else who makes you laugh
The farewell is painful, but I'm glad that it was you that I loved
Even though the pain stops my breath and my tears fall

Please don't forget that we were happy
Even if you meet someone else who makes you laugh
The farewell is painful, but I'm glad that it was you that I loved
Now I have to let go of this love that was unable to connect

The only person who will make me smile is you
Even though as my love deepens I feel more pain

Please don't forget that we were happy
Even if you meet someone else who makes you laugh
The farewell is painful, but I'm glad that it was you that I loved
Gathering my sorrowful tears, the only thing I can do is say...

Goodbye

I just need to hide this.

Elison.